Respect (and Prayers) for Jenny Sanford

I hate hearing about politicians' affairs. I'm opposed to extramarital affairs on moral and practical grounds; they are never good for anyone, especially the children of the family (or families) involved. When it's a politician, though, it's a lot worse because it's all in the public eye. The press puts a camera, a microphone, or a notepad under the chin of anyone remotely connected, asking silly questions about how it happened and how everyone feels about it.

It happened the way it always happens: by degrees. No one wakes up and says, "I think I'll wreck my perfectly happy marriage with an affair today." One small thing follows another until there's enough emotional separation between the spouses, and then an opportunity presents itself. "It just happened," people say. It didn't just happen. It's been happening for a while and it took an affair for you to notice. Those reporters know how everyone feels, too; they feel just like you did when it was your father, mother, spouse, friend or yourself. Have you forgotten? I doubt that.

The other horrific thing about a politician's affair is that absurd press conference moment when the man (and it does seem to always be the man) finally admits to it and apologizes with his loving, devoted wife doing her best Tammy Wynette on his right. Only a soulless PR flack could have come up with this idea. (I used to be one, so I know a bit about it.) I always wonder if these women are completely without selfish desires or just completely without self-respect.

I can't put into words how much respect I have for Jenny Sanford today. I have no desire to take sides on the issues in their marriage or paint either Sanford as good or evil, but it was so very refreshing to find her absent that spectacle. I hope, as I always do for married couples, that they work things through and find a way to be happy and faithful together, for themselves and their children. Sincerely. But today, standing apart was the right thing to do. I hope others in that unfortunate situation follow her example.